One of the most wonderful aspects about sex is that is not one single act or position that constitutes 'sex' and is only really limited by the imagination and the comfort of all involved.
Being open and free about yourself, your body and your sex life can be incredibly liberating, especially since many people have not followed the immortal words of Salt-n-Pepa and talked about sex.
So much art, literature and creative works have been created about sex because sex is a creative expression of intimacy, passion and affection, and indulging that creativity and having the best sex possible is about exploring a person’s body, their mind and their desires.
Curiosity is as fundamental to a truly intimate saucy encounter as wearing a set of erotic lingerie, orgasm-inducing sex toys and any other physical aspect of sex, and indulging in that curiosity not only leads to better, more imaginative sex but also a closer relationship to your partner.
Here are some questions to get you started, and which can lead to deep feelings, further questions and a deeper understanding of what your partner wants.
Do You Masturbate?
Most people touch themselves when they are alone and self-love is an important part of exploring someone’s body, loves and desires.
After all, the best way to know what you like someone else to do to you is to try it on yourself.
This question tends to have a fairly clear answer but is a great question to start other questions, such as what they think about when they masturbate, whether they use toys, whether they would masturbate in front of you and how they like to be touched and kissed.
What Is Your Favourite Part Of Sex?
An entire tome could be filled with all the questions you could (and perhaps should) ask your partner about how sex feels for them, but if all of these could be reduced to one single, important question that can lead into the others, it is about their favourite part of sex.
Intimacy is about far more than penetration, and so in many cases, the best part of sex will involve exploring each other’s bodies, passionate kisses, experimentation, dirty talk, and many other elements.
These answers naturally lead to further questions about what they like about sex, whether they like fast, intense sex or slow, passionate sexual encounters, as well as the kinds of experiences they want
It can even, so long as they are comfortable talking about it, lead to conversations about sexual history, both the best and the worst sexual experiences they have had.
Do You Watch Pornography?
Erotic images and videos can often shape people’s attitudes to sex, desires and wants, especially since pornography is often watched by people when they are relatively sexually inexperienced and in some respects permeates into wider ideas about body image and sexuality.
This question, on its own, may not be that enlightening, given that half of all adults in the UK
Not everyone may watch videos but they may read erotic fiction, for instance, and this provides a very different type of gratification than a purely visual one. Chatting about this can help bring the healthier aspects of erotica to the bedroom.